So the first thing that you should know is that sometimes others assert that I have poor filters and am a little too honest. This is one context when that quality might pose risks for the reader.
You have been warned! It took me a while to get the message, but by the time my ex left this love note under my pillow in January , I was beginning to understand. She wanted out. Or, to put it another way, she wanted me out! I knew her, of course β we worked in the same coworking space NextSpace Santa Cruz β and I had flirted with her a little, as I often do, but that never goes very far, which is part of the fun. In short, I would never have dreamed that that she might have any interest in going home with me.
She lived with her boyfriend, was her own boss in an interesting field, and was much younger! And as soon as I sat down next to her in the car that evening, well maybe a minute or two later, feeling rather than watching her smoothing down her skirt as she settled into the passenger seat, I was primed and ready for action!
I should pause here to explain that this quick reaction was a source of some relief. During the later years of the marriage, intimacy had become notable only for its rarity. We ended up in separate beds, hers of course a queen in the master bedroom and me first downstairs on a sofa and then on a single bed in a bedroom then used for storage.
None of this was very conducive to intimacy. During the last 16 months, we had shared one miserable encounter, with more tears literally than pleasure, and that was it. NextSpace was such a great place to work during its formative years. Here is a comment on me from a cute member I used to flirt with. Doubts had begun to creep in over those waning years β I knew I was getting older β but they pretty much flew out of the car window on the short drive back to the condo.
