Past child-bearing age and the pressures of juggling work and a young family, romance for the something can be wonderfully rich and satisfying with opportunities for love, passion, companionship, shared travel and joint voyaging through all that life has to offer. During a brief flirtation with internet dating a year ago, most of the men I met had very recently separated โ some were still dividing up the spoils down to the pots and pans โ and clearly nursing wounded egos hence their rush to go online and re-partner.
But I did also meet others who had let themselves settle and adjust. Just none that I felt like pursing. I went to a party recently and got chatting to a woman in her late 50s. Noticing she had a new partner, I asked how they had met. Although they were introduced by a mutual friend, Angie had dabbled in online dating and instanced one man who had suggested, as a first meeting, a rendezvous at the airport on the way to a holiday in Hawaii!
Talk about speed dating! This puts a new spin on swingers, just that these ones would be in collared Polo shirts, checked trousers and studded shoes. Golf is just not me โ from the clothes to the clubiness. A friend suggested I downloaded Bumble, an app designed by women for women. Women make the first swipe to the right and men have 24 hours to respond. One woman, who did succeed in finding love, believes that the profile and how it is written is all-important โ forget photo-based apps.
For her, one spelling mistake or errant comma spells a no. How a potential partner responds to an exhibition provides a good insight into their personality too. But what is the likelihood of meeting an available man โ I seem to have been a magnet for married men all my life โ by chance in a gallery and getting cosy over the captions?
Which brings me back to options in the real world and my determination to try a few. Hanging out in cafes with my dog and an interesting book is not new, but I will aim to frequent different cafes in different neighbourhoods interestingly, a friend recently sent me an article detailing which Melbourne suburbs have the highest density of singletons. Then a girlfriend and I plan to go to book launches and other events that have a social component, the kind of functions where you can start a conversation with someone based on what you have just seen or heard.
