My friends rolled their eyes when I told them I was in love again. As usual, it happened quickly. I went outside to ask someone for a lighter, he lent me one and two weeks later we were inseparable. He was β and still remains β handsome, funny, straight and incredibly monogamous. But before I met him, I was in a queer polyamorous relationship with an amazing non-binary person. Now I am still queer and polyamorous poly. I just happen to be in a heterosexual monogamous relationship.
Queer as in odd but also queer as in averse to established ideas of gender expression and sexuality. Coming out as polyamorous came a little later but to me, it was as much a part of my queerness as my sexuality. It was simply another way I was subverting the rigid rules of relationships.
Don't forget to turn on notifications! Polyamory is an umbrella term for quite a few different relationship styles, and basically refers to a consensual partnership β romantic, sexual or emotional β with more than one person.
It made me understand the importance of honest conversations, no matter how uncomfortable they may be. I learned about how to feel jealousy without becoming possessive. And how to love without a focus on control. Knowing my partner was out with someone else was never easy. Naturally you wonder if the person is hotter or funnier than you. But those feelings tended to fade once we were back in the same room.
Dates could be arranged by someone else. Romance, sex , quality time were not my problem. But my open relationship eventually ended because I was becoming complacent. Instead of addressing our issues, I was subsidising my failing relationship with other partners.
