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Katherine D. So she took matters into her own hands. In July, she made a Twitter thread, inviting people to put themselves out there by replying with a photo of themselves and some information on what—or who—they were looking for. The thread took off. Even today, people continue to add their pictures to the thread, seeking love all across the United States. If this feels a bit like old-fashioned matchmaking, it is. These operations are often ad hoc, based on platforms like Twitter and TikTok, and—unlike the dating apps, with their endless menu of eligible suitors—hyperfocused on one person at a time.
Randa Sakallah launched Hot Singles in December to solve her own dating blues. Yes, each profile features the requisite information: name, sexual orientation, interests, and some photos. Dating apps may be quick and easy to use, but critics say their design and their focus on images reduces people to caricatures. Morgan, who started the long-running Twitter thread, is a black woman who says that the dating-app experience can be exhausting because of her race.
Dating-app fatigue has a number of sources. Plus, the geographic parameters typically set on such apps often actually make the dating pool worse. Reply to thealexisgermany let the TikTok match making begin. The pandemic changed a lot of preconceived notions about factors like distance and geography. With remote work and flexible schedules, people can be less stringent about where and when to meet—and those who are seeking long-term relationships are interested in doing so safely, thoughtfully, and with value for their time.
And before Tinder and other apps made swiping through potential romances normal for millions of people, Missed Connections and Craigslist personal ads were a digital mainstay for finding a special someone.
Post pandemic, though, dating apps are facing a reckoning. The millennials who revolutionized their use as a way to redefine relationships, sex, and marriage are now older and often seeking longer-term relationships that were often difficult to find even before. They itch for something different, and increasingly that means looking to old-school matchmaking delivered through modern technology.