Contrary to popular belief, submissives have the ultimate control in BDSM play. BDSM is often regarded as this dark, freaky, non-normal kind of sexual preference, often forcing its players to retreat into the shadows and stick to carefully curated communities alienated from the majority of society. BDSM participants identify themselves in one of three main ways: dominant, submissive, and switch as oscillating between the first two. This kind of restrainment can increase sexual enjoyment for some, and induce somatosensory of warmth, coolness, pressure, pain feelings in different areas of the body.
Discipline: A series of rules and punishments β all agreed upon before a sexual encounter begins β for a usually dominant partner to exert control over and dictate the actions of their usually submissive partner. The above-mentioned bondage can be a form of, and a vehicle for, discipline. Dominance: The act of dominating a sexual partner, both in and out of sex.
They have as much control over deciding what happens to them as their dominant does, even more so, perhaps. Sadism and Masochism, or Sadomasochism: The pleasure that a BDSM participant derives from either inflicting pain sadism or receiving pain masochism ; this could also manifest as emotional pain in the form of humiliation.
Called intense sensation play, BDSM can involve hitting, pinching or causing any other physical harm to a sexual partner β but this is all consensual. Consent is the key to a healthy expression of sado-masochism, with an understanding between all partners that the activity could stop at any moment should anybody be uncomfortable with the intensity of play. Consent β when given in an uncoerced, enthusiastic, clear manner with boundaries outlined β makes a BDSM encounter a safe and inclusive sexual experience for all partners.
Consent and boundaries can be outlined in a formal contract, a verbal agreement or a casual conversation. Consent is also not absolute β the desires and comfort of sexual players in BDSM are of the utmost value; if a player is uncomfortable anytime before or during the experience, they can easily revoke the consent, and other players must respect the change of heart.
